2

RAGE day–1 step forward, 2 step backwards

Didn’t sleep again. Itched all night. Weeping, oozing, dead skin everywhere. Grrr!! Next day with swollen eyes and so much dead skin on my eyelids I could barely open my eyes. I had to get my boys ready for the day, their milk, their clothes, simple stuff. But i just couldn’t function really. My husband woke up and I just said to him ‘I haven’t slept all night!’ angrily and he tried to ask me how I was or why, i couldn't really hear him cos he lost his voice, he is quite sick. I got more angrier like WTF do you think? I go thru this shit every night don’t you fucken know?! grrrr!!! He took the boys out and sorted their breakfast. i felt really bad afterwards cos I know I shouldn’t let out my anger on him. But I just hate all this, as I thought things were gonna improve, it goes downhill. I really understand why some TSW say this journey is 1 step forward, 2 step backwards now. My face has been weeping crazily! it dries up and then underneath is ooze. GRRRRRR!! i fucken hate OOOZZZZZZZZZZZEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was still in rage and came across Miss Kitty’s post on ‘I’m not mad, I’m just Angry’. oh written so well with best humour! It really made me feel better. Please please please read if you have time. Esp ppl who are normal (not going thru TSW) you will really understand what the fuck we’re going through! LOL
http://misskittydefeatseczema.blogspot.co.nz/2013/08/im-not-mad-im-just-angry.html

OK staying positive and doing what I can while suffering………….hope everyone is having a better day and doing OK

.........…………...........................

Ok no I lied I'm gonna keep raging!

So today I went out and a few ppl who I bumped into had along these lines conversations with me:
"Oh u have eczema aye?!" Horrified look thinking 'shit does eczema get that bad?!!' Looking at my munted face. 

I go on and tell her it's steroid withdrawal symptoms and a bit of background. Then she's like:
"Oh my so and so's daughter had bad eczema and she cured it naturally by changing her diet!"
There I had this image pop up:



But I said: 'well yeah diet does make a big difference for eczema but mine is not even eczema anymore it's a rebound of drug withdrawal'

She nods head and looks concerned like 'r u sure u don't wanna see a dr to get a proper diagnosis?'

Ok I understand other ppl if they have a hard time believing me. Ppl who I don't see everyday. But when ppl I see everyday... Family, who are shaky in believing this TSW cure thing really saddens me and makes me feel so alone :( but even if I'm alone. I will prove to u in 2 years time, 3 years time, ok even fucken 10 years time if it will fucken take that long, I will have normal skin just like u ok after this hell rebound!!!!!!!

-ahfaye-

Thank you for reading this post. I wish you great health, happiness and success in everything you do!

2 comments:

  1. UnknownOctober 5, 2013 at 1:58 AM

    I'm fed up of reiterating myself too :( I made my blog initially just as a severe eczema patient so that people could get to grips with what I go through on a daily basis but now I've discovered RSS it's even harder to get my point across!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. -ahfaye-October 8, 2013 at 11:00 PM

      hey Jenny i guess one day this RSS thing will be more of a common knowledge and we all warriors are part of this contribution! hang in there! xxx

      Delete